Doh! It's ToH!

Party wipes? We scoff.

#5

(Adventure #4 has been skipped in the log, unfortunately, but this starts #5)

In this adventure:

  1. Three different hallways! One has the sound of weeping- let’s not go there.
  2. Ok, the second shot a spear out, sticks in Myles, and has a blank wall behind the door. Let’s try the third.
  3. A blank wall, but this one is a secret passageway! What’s behind it? A blank painting!
  4. Myles throws a spear at it, and oww, has a spear wound in his shoulder. Also, his picture appeared on the painting, and now both radiate some evil. Great.
  5. Drawing a moustache on the painting does not put one on Myles, darn.
  6. But trying to remove the paint from the painting deals soul damage to him. Ok, let’s not do that.
  7. Oh, and Myles can’t walk far from the painting. Great. Cleric says possession. Exorcism time!
  8. Uh… spectres coming. TO ARMS!
  9. Turn, turn, turn, chants the paladin, punch punch punchpunch goes the monk, and out pops the spirit. Nice.
  10. Moving on, checking for traps down a tunnel, we “don’t find anything”. On opening the door, we all fall unconscious immediately from a gas trap. Frick. GG everyone.
  11. WAIT! THE PALADIN HAS TWO MINIONS BEHIND US!
  12. Oh, well, one flees from terror. But the other, Mr. Dwarfy, saves our asses from an iron Indiana Jones-esque wrecking ball! Party wipe? Averted.
  13. Moving on to the weeping room. We find a figure shrouded in a misty room, radiating an aura of good… and convinced we’re minions sent by Acererak (alternatively, Asterisk, or just Ass, as Jo points out)
  14. Trying to reason with her, sending people in. The monk gets slapped by her, and sets his int to 2. Uhhh…
  15. We say we’ll do whatever she wants us to to prove that we’re not Ass’s minions. So, she asks for the (now) idiot monk to go in. Naked.
  16. A few minutes later, he comes out sane, and she’s satisfied with us.
  17. …….
  18. Ok, but we still have a problem that we can’t get her out. Damn. Eventually, we leave her, with my minions as company trying to dig a tunnel out of her room.
  19. Oooh, and adamantium door! And what’s this, three slots and some fuckery with keys? Nah…. shapestone the thing down. What plot devices?
  20. Massive room. Pillars make you float uncontrollably, so, no touchie. A few demon mouths similar to the sphere of annihilation earlier, except they don’t quite annihilate with the same force as the first one. An evil wish-ish granting gemstone, and a massive throne with sceptre and crown.
  21. Wearing the crown doesn’t seem to do anything. Until you can’t take it off. Great.
  22. Oh look, the throne has an image of a crown inlaid with silver, where the actual crown itself has no silver. Touch the silver end of the scepter to the picture and…. a secret passageway appears!
  23. What about the crown though…. Jo, who has it stuck to her head, tries touching the silver end, and is instantly vaporized. Oops. +1 to the DM.
  24. Wait, the cleric can restore dead. Ok, remove that, Jo’s back! Probably had a rather short and amusing conversation with death in the meantime.
  25. Going forward, there’s a room with evil iron statues, and three vases, one of the smouldering. The monk decides it’d be funny to throw it into the middle of the party, but it’s luckily caught.
  26. Ok, take it into the big chamber, and open it there.
  27. ….. why is the DM sniggering and reaching into…. holy **** that’s a big figurine. BALROG you say? Well, here comes party wipe two…
  28. Yup, almost oneshots the cleric, and blocks the escape. Great. Jo uses the evil stone and wishes for it to vanish… and it says it will. Eventually. Dammit.
  29. Wait. Jo still has the crown of instant-death……..
  30. Toss to the hiding thief, with a mighty leap, slapping a pillar to become weightless, flies at the Balrog’s head- he notices last second, and so an attack roll is made…. 19!
  31. I knight thee, Sir Dead-a-lot, Mr. Balrog!
  32. Moral of the story: We scoff at party wipe attempts.

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dzfischer

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